we, like star dust wanting to be seen in the eyes, in the depths of our souls.
One gaze is enough & can just turn my neurotic into the worse pathetic wreckish witch... thank you for telling me I exist with your eyes & question marks. thank you.
Hey can you believe I smiled in between my latest post and now? sighs. sometimes even breathing is just way too difficult and Gosh how I get angry inside of me when I sound so miserable.
I know all these paths, I've tread them too many times, why the heck I'm going there again? to find what? to know what? the more I go down the more I awake the dark twin in me. and then it's not so easy to love myself...
though I do. Thank Goddess I'm still there for me for I just feel like I have nothing no one to rely on. why do I feel this?
and screw all that fucking crap that will tell me I'm an artist this is how fucked up we all are. all I know is that we're all so lonely at times. no matter what.
whatever. I still wish there were more.
thanks for those who sent me kind words and support.
I close my eyes swirling in the music of shivers I know your name I know your door Fresh air of spring perfume in my lungs I breathe can I climb up the stairs of your mind certain rages can never subside lush scent in the garden the orchid tides is coming Freja take me by the hand like me she always love another dance invisible gates nothing ever remains out of reach wash the darkness with the pure we can see the horizon we are a light pink tourmaline and emeral in my veins assuage the rime on the feather path with your question marks they enter me they caress me they smile to me they kiss me through they obsess me we all need reasons to be beautiful & to scatter the inside gem in glows(...)
Blinded by the flames falling into a well well well well down down down is there any other end I don't want to hear the blazing tongues it hurts in the dark I need to jump on my merry-go-round of poems I can't stand this dress of wounds and bruises in the mirror break the glass I swam in the abyss of the hopeless romantics I wanted to find their underwater graveyards Did you know there is avalanche of stars in the depths of the ocean It's only in my head I can't stand the leaking final door there is no answer some silence cut me and some words slashed the core of me I am still standing on this long empty road under a coma sky I need to read my roads to elsewhere teach you my language The little ghosts tiptoed trying to find their place to hide in me the enemy I can't stand this bleeding Where is my ship to another emotion galaxy I cannot translate the rampage in my garden flowers and petals disorder can I swim to the tender share where there exist a twisted & lonely soul care(...)
Siren in the darkest seas of me screaming alarm S.O.S...S.O.S... Terrifying void and lack of sense at the end of the cord entangled wires oh so meaningless echoes of my veins deadly descent for my soul fireflies Hades hold me tight in his arms The real violence is here before my eyes when I could just vanish unnoticed in the light of my pain Swallow more of the unsaid A lack of word a lack of glowing stitches from your soul deadly strikes me I can forever walk that haunted manor of dust I can cling to memories and kiss my fears silence of soul seperation of self surrender of sunset sudden outward sorrow such overflowing sighs no elation no sacrifice just the wonderful black out I'm crawling back to the Nihilist poets attic fucking blurry ink and dots soaking words who's got an umbrella and a magical parachute to fall in my hell to reach my den to take my hand there is nothing no one and you won't understand(...)